Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I don't deserve a penis
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
