IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
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so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
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What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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