This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
