She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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