i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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