don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
