this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Quick, to the slutcave!
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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