you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize