I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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