Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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