Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
