I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Congratulations! We have a period
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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