he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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