if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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