Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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