Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I painted my nails silver

  (586): View more from Michigan

  And what are the implications of that?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien

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  (313): I painted my nails silver (586): And what are the implications of that? (313): Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien http://tfl.nu/iy32
  Replies (3) Good night (1855) Bad night (508)
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  (858): View more from California

  So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?

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  (858): So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto? http://tfl.nu/poyg
  Replies (18) Good night (1339) Bad night (3362) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.

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  (804): names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving. http://tfl.nu/d6qb
  Replies (8) Good night (3494) Bad night (428) Order T-Shirt
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"

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  (514): i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon" http://tfl.nu/hj7f
  Replies (25) Good night (957) Bad night (5413) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?

  (1-601): View more from Mississippi

  yes

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?

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  (601): ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest? (1-601): yes (601): did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me? http://tfl.nu/1ahx
  Replies (13) Good night (4741) Bad night (802)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back

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  (203): Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back http://tfl.nu/t7ho
  Replies (63) Good night (2120) Bad night (3933) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?

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  (317): Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume? http://tfl.nu/reh6
  Replies (9) Good night (3211) Bad night (848) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?

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  (313): Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was? http://tfl.nu/iwh3
  Replies (4) Good night (2277) Bad night (907) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."

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  (412): It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus." http://tfl.nu/ftkz
  Replies (4) Good night (2093) Bad night (567) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.

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  (773): he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer. http://tfl.nu/dnae
  Replies (7) Good night (2593) Bad night (565) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.

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  (727): Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome. http://tfl.nu/3ucr
  Replies (19) Good night (1858) Bad night (531) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.

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  (914): He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will. http://tfl.nu/096i
  Replies (8) Good night (2146) Bad night (505)
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  (619): View more from California

  I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"

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  (619): I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn" http://tfl.nu/h75w
  Replies (5) Good night (1261) Bad night (382) Order T-Shirt
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.

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  (573): It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children. http://tfl.nu/cjdr
  Replies (2) Good night (662) Bad night (250) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"

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  (503): Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck" http://tfl.nu/2coz
  Replies (6) Good night (304) Bad night (324) Order T-Shirt

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