life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
That accounts for only three of the penises
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
