Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
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We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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