There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize