He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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