you're like a bully in the Christmas story
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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