I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
How does it feel to date your dad?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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