i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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