Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 ðŸžðŸ·
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
