If that was your dad, he is hot
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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