worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
