I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
