You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
The convent might be a nice break from real life
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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