Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
