I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
