She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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