Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Randomize
