this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
