Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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