btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
