Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
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