But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
When are your genitals available?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
