But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i may or may not be watching the land before time
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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