I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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