Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
