thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
