11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
