You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
