and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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