i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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