I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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