just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
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He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
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Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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