Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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