i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize