I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
