Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize