Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize